Friday, August 6, 2010

wooo weee

this is my first blog on here! it feels kinda weird not being on facebook. We  leave for Warrensburg next friday morning which I am thoroughly excited about it. Baby Claire is doing great! I am 23 weeks along today! I am over halfway there! Her birthday is November 18th as of now I'm scheduled to deliver her at 7:30 am. I am SOO excited to have her around. I love feeling her in my belly but with losing my last baby I can't wait to hold little Claire in my arms. At the same time, I feel bad for thinking that because if the pregnancy is going to be the only time I get with her I don't want to take her for granted. I'm well aware I could lose her. It helps to know that the medical staff on our "case" do not foresee it happening again. Apparently 2 stillbirths in a row has been unseen by them which is awesome! I still have days I don't know how I will make it without her. I wonder what life will be like without her. I wonder how it could be to have her here. How would it be to have a 1 year old here. I wonder what if she would be as excited for her little sister as I had hoped she would when I was pregnant with her. I'm sure there was a time I wondered what it would be like when I got pregnant with her little brother or sister. I don't remember everything I used to "fantisize" (sp) about when she was on the way, but I do remember some things. I wish I would have kept better track of my pregnancy with her. I am trying to do a better job with Claire's pregnancy but unfortunately its not been going as well as I'd like. Joe's super excited for his daughter to be here! He talks about what life will be like after she gets here such as watching football with her. I'm actually excited for her to be able to watch football with her daddy.

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