Thursday, February 24, 2011

new beginnings

I struggle so much with changing myself. I think "I would like to start exercising to make myself feel better but I just don't have the time."totally untrue! I have heard it said that a person will make time for whats important to them. I totally agree! I don't like to admit it but I do agree. Nobody likes to think of themselves as  'mess up.' Unfortunately I get caught up in 'mess up' mode. I make so many excuses! I want to change the way I live but I just struggle with summoning the courage to change and to think I will actually stick to's what I would like to change in my life and maybe one (or more) of you will have some advice..I need all I can get:

-Eat healthier. you are what you eat. you eat crap and you feel like crap. Not to mention it is vital in order to maintain my 'diabetes life'. its very hard for me when" everyone else is doing it"-aka eating whatever strikes their fancy. its so hard not to be resentful. I know just because "everyone else is doing it" is a lame excuse. someone once told me i need to accept who I am..still working on it. I think that in order to honor God with my body I need to watch what I put into it.

-I'd like to be a better mommy. I do want whats best for my baby. I do! In having a conversation with a friend, I discovered I think I am still dealing with some post pardom depression. I feel so lonesome throughout the day. I don't have as many friendships here as I did at cccb. Most of the ones I have gained already have close friends so I feel a littlle a lot out of the 'loop'. It's not as easy to get out my apt. here since I have my baby. I look forward to the day I no longer feel inadequate to be Claire's momma.

-Be a better wife. I feel like I'm constantly nagging. I've come to realize (finally) I will never  be 100% satisfied with him. I felt as if I should for a long time.

- Better Christ follower. I could be doing as something as simple as praying for my building. Prayer is so powerful. I don't know why I don't use it!! so cliche but so true.

my reason for thinking of a new beginning:

1 comment:

  1. Hey Ash!

    Sounds like you are a good mother if you are wanting to make changes in your life to make you better! I just wanted to throw some ideas your way because I made this shift two years ago.
    -try new things. Just try a few new ideas each week. dont throw everything away and start over. Make an effort thats easily accounted for. Like I will eat 3 different colored fresh foods each day. Or something like that :)
    -I have no advice on mommyship. but the best advice I was given so far in this pregnancy, is to love love love my son. You can never love a child too much. Dont feel bad about holding her so much or loving on her... just love her.
    -same here on the wife thing.

    Hope your changes happen as you hope them too :)