I'm currently listening to an online sermon about prayer. I would say my prayer life is sort of like a roller coaster. Higher sometimes and lower others. I hate that I barely say "hello" to God before I come to Him with my laundry list of crap I'd been dealing with that day..or night. I've recently started a journal..again. I haven't really kept one adamantly for years. I was keeping one for a prayer journal but as I said..its been a roller coaster.
Ella's birthday is soon..July 19th but thats still soon in my eyes. I think I'm having a harder time in my grief because of it. She's always in my heart but it becomes a little more apparent at the time of year when her birthday comes. Even holidays and my,Joe or Claire's birthday makes it more real that she's not here.
I've discovered I need more to do. I have too much time on my hands. I think thats largely to contribute to the sadness and anxiety lately