change

Change is rough! Super rough! I've been trying to make some in my life. Although, I admit, i've not been as serious about it as I want to be. For starters, I want to lose weight. You see, I've been overweight since I was a kid. probably about age 10 is when things went south weight wise for me. So, its become a way of life of sorts. I hate it. I hate looking at my body..its gross. During my pregnancy with Ella, I was given the official word..diabetes. When she was born, they waited a couple months and tested me again..sure enough Type 2. One would think being told that information would be enough to put me on the bandwagon to exercise and good health..nope! The first couple months after Ella died I ate whatever I wanted...I wanted to die..to be with my daughter. Then I got counseling. I was wisely told, to take walks. I did. 3 times a day to clear my head. I noticed the inches coming off but don't think I cared that much..my daughter was still gone from me.

Now, I try to watch my diet. I don't always do well. at all! Its very hard for me to accept I am different. Yes, I'm only 26 but this is the card i've been dealt so I must play it. rough..

I want to practice more Godly attributes, namely the fruits of the spirit in Galatians 5-peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self-control


Joe is still working 2 jobs and is busy as ever!  He will leave for the military soon. I am NOT looking forward to the time we will be away from each other. Claire is doing wonderfully. We've even started to help her fall asleep in her crib instead of my arms..its a slow process but gives me a chance to work on being gentle and patient! I start classes again monday! I hope they go well. My gpa turned out to be A LOT better than I expected

until next time, thats my life in a nutshell